Post by "Rockstar" Willie Bard on Aug 9, 2006 14:59:29 GMT -5
(We see in Willie Bard's apartment, the teen, the store clerk, and the motorist, struggling to tear down what was to be a surprise party for his victory at Trial By Fire)
Clerk - Quick, do something with the cake!
Motorist - It's 6 feet by 3 feet, where the fuck am I gonna hide this?
Teen - Just... i don't know. Put it somewhere where Willie won't be expecting it...
(The motorist jogs off with a huge cake in his hands)
Teen - Ok. Now what about the banner?
Clerk - Um... take it down and put it in-
(But where the Clerk wanted the banner to be put was never known, as at that moment, Willie Bard opens the door to see all of his friends standing in his apartment)
Bard - ......what the hell are you all doing here?
Teen - Uh..........
(The motorist runs back into the room and doesn't see Willie)
Motorist - Who's taking down the- Oh, hi Willie.
Bard - Why are you all here?
Clerk - Umm... well, you're friend there (Pointing at the teen) thought that a party was necessary. See, he thought you were gonna win.
Motorist - And cause I don't have a life, I came down too.
Bard - Well you're all wasting your time. Now if you'll excuse me, I've just had a long drive from the airport. I gotta go to the bathroom.
(Bard starts towards the bathroom, but the motorist blocks him)
Motorist - Uh. Wait. Willie, don't you want to sit down first. I'll make you something.
Bard - No. I want to go to the bathroom. I'm in a bad mood man, don't bug me.
Motorist - Wait! You can't.
Bard - Why?
Motorist - Cause... I just took a huge dump. The toilet's clogged...
Bard - I'll take a plunger to it... now MOVE!
(Bard shoves the motorist out of the way and heads towards the bathroom)
Teen - (Realizing) You put the cake in there, didn't you?
Motorist - Umm... yes.
Clerk - Why the hell did you do that?
Motorist - He told me (Pointing at the teen) to put in a place that he wouldn't expect it to-
(A loud yell interrupts the motorist. Bard comes back into the living room with frosting and cake up to both of his ankles)
Bard - WHO PUT THAT CAKE IN THE BATHROOM?!
(The teen and the clerk back away and point at the motorist, who realizes that they sold him out. He turns and sees that Willie is an inch from his face, rearing back to hit him. The motorist cringes, then Bard decides not to hit him and he sits down)
Bard - Sorry dude. I'm just not in a good mood.
Clerk - Understandable. I mean, that's a tough loss for anyone to swallow.
Motorist - Especially in the first round.
Teen - If you hadn't gone to Warped Tour, I could've shown you a counter to that Cohln-Lock. I found a video on how to counter it online.
Bard - Yeah. You're right. I got sidetracked. I was thinking of my amusement, rather then the tourney. But that was in the past. I've got some goblin this week on Lockdown.
Teen - Yeah. He's not that much of a deal. Sure he beat Animal at Trial By Fire.
Bard - Yeah. What was with that megaphone.
(All three people shrug)
Bard - Well, this week. There is no more fucking around. I'm gonna bounce back from Trial By Fire. I'm gonna take everything the Goblin gives and keep on coming. I won't go down that easily. I'm the US Champ dammit! I gotta start acting like it!
Teen - Yeah, that Goblin guy is gonna regret wanting this match...
Motorist - Seriously, who names their kid Lars?
Clerk - Or Goblin?
(All 4 men laugh)
Bard - Ahh... that was funny. But as for right now. You guys had this party set up, right?
(The clerk, the teen, and the motorist look uncomfortably at each other)
Bard - (continuing) WELL THEN IT'S PARTY TIME!
(All 4 men cheer and the scene fades to black)
Clerk - Quick, do something with the cake!
Motorist - It's 6 feet by 3 feet, where the fuck am I gonna hide this?
Teen - Just... i don't know. Put it somewhere where Willie won't be expecting it...
(The motorist jogs off with a huge cake in his hands)
Teen - Ok. Now what about the banner?
Clerk - Um... take it down and put it in-
(But where the Clerk wanted the banner to be put was never known, as at that moment, Willie Bard opens the door to see all of his friends standing in his apartment)
Bard - ......what the hell are you all doing here?
Teen - Uh..........
(The motorist runs back into the room and doesn't see Willie)
Motorist - Who's taking down the- Oh, hi Willie.
Bard - Why are you all here?
Clerk - Umm... well, you're friend there (Pointing at the teen) thought that a party was necessary. See, he thought you were gonna win.
Motorist - And cause I don't have a life, I came down too.
Bard - Well you're all wasting your time. Now if you'll excuse me, I've just had a long drive from the airport. I gotta go to the bathroom.
(Bard starts towards the bathroom, but the motorist blocks him)
Motorist - Uh. Wait. Willie, don't you want to sit down first. I'll make you something.
Bard - No. I want to go to the bathroom. I'm in a bad mood man, don't bug me.
Motorist - Wait! You can't.
Bard - Why?
Motorist - Cause... I just took a huge dump. The toilet's clogged...
Bard - I'll take a plunger to it... now MOVE!
(Bard shoves the motorist out of the way and heads towards the bathroom)
Teen - (Realizing) You put the cake in there, didn't you?
Motorist - Umm... yes.
Clerk - Why the hell did you do that?
Motorist - He told me (Pointing at the teen) to put in a place that he wouldn't expect it to-
(A loud yell interrupts the motorist. Bard comes back into the living room with frosting and cake up to both of his ankles)
Bard - WHO PUT THAT CAKE IN THE BATHROOM?!
(The teen and the clerk back away and point at the motorist, who realizes that they sold him out. He turns and sees that Willie is an inch from his face, rearing back to hit him. The motorist cringes, then Bard decides not to hit him and he sits down)
Bard - Sorry dude. I'm just not in a good mood.
Clerk - Understandable. I mean, that's a tough loss for anyone to swallow.
Motorist - Especially in the first round.
Teen - If you hadn't gone to Warped Tour, I could've shown you a counter to that Cohln-Lock. I found a video on how to counter it online.
Bard - Yeah. You're right. I got sidetracked. I was thinking of my amusement, rather then the tourney. But that was in the past. I've got some goblin this week on Lockdown.
Teen - Yeah. He's not that much of a deal. Sure he beat Animal at Trial By Fire.
Bard - Yeah. What was with that megaphone.
(All three people shrug)
Bard - Well, this week. There is no more fucking around. I'm gonna bounce back from Trial By Fire. I'm gonna take everything the Goblin gives and keep on coming. I won't go down that easily. I'm the US Champ dammit! I gotta start acting like it!
Teen - Yeah, that Goblin guy is gonna regret wanting this match...
Motorist - Seriously, who names their kid Lars?
Clerk - Or Goblin?
(All 4 men laugh)
Bard - Ahh... that was funny. But as for right now. You guys had this party set up, right?
(The clerk, the teen, and the motorist look uncomfortably at each other)
Bard - (continuing) WELL THEN IT'S PARTY TIME!
(All 4 men cheer and the scene fades to black)